The Tales of Dating

The Tales of Dating

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"Risking our hearts is why we're alive."


I have a lot of single friends. I'm single and when you're single you tend to stick with the single ones. It's easier. Less painful. And single girls can stay out past midnight. (sorry, mom.)

My married friends stick with their husbands, my in-serious-relationship friends stick with other girls in the same boat or their boyfriends and the single gals are just hanging with whoever is offering the best time. (Get your mind out of the gutter.) 

This is just a generalization. It's not always that case. When I was in my serious relationship (That's a WHOLE different story) I tended to hang with other girls who were in the same boat. Now that I'm happily single I just hang out with my married friends on Saturday afternoons...

Even though being single is great, relationships can be wonderful, and marriage is, well, whatever marriage is. My point to all of this is that no one has greater stories than single people. Whether they are funny, terrible, awkward, random, bad, wonderful, or lame, dating stories from single people entertain us all and make us wonder why we even try.

Why do we try? Because risking our hearts is why we're alive.

     Elizabeth and Chicken Boy

For instance, my friend (I won't use real names, I'll use their middle names) Elizabeth, was asked out by a guy who owns a Chick Fil A. He even gave her a free coupon for a free meal when. The problem with Mr. Chicken? Well... he didn't know the game. 

Dating is a game, whether you play it or not. It's a game.

 ( wouldn't want to date this either?)

Mr. Chicken was a little TOO eager to date Elizabeth. She met Mr. Eat More Chicken Less Beef at a wedding. I honestly believe you should never date someone you meet at a wedding. He asked for her number because she was a single bridesmaid and he was a single groomsman. Obviously they should start dating.

See, that's why dating at weddings is a bad idea.

So he thinks they should hang out again. Homeboy started texting a lot, asking if he could call her and kept insisting that they double date it up sometime. When you first meet someone I think you know if there is that 'thing.' That 'Thing' that makes you think, "Yes. I want to see that person again."

Elizabeth wasn't feeling that 'thing.' It was too much, too soon, too annoying. Guys, there is a reason you should wait a day or two to call, give us the time to make you want to call. If you call us right away, you look desperate. If you call too late, we think we are just an option. Two days. Two days works. And never ask if you can call. If you ask us now, we have you by the balls forever. (Sorry, mom.)

Since Elizabeth is one of the nice girls, she replied back to his text messages or answered the phone when he called. At the end of two weeks, chicken boy got the idea. It just wasn't going to happen.

Personally I think if he had given her more than one free Chick-Fil-A meal, she would have stuck around longer.

     Laine and DWI Guy

(Don't drink and drive. It's just not worth it.)

My friend, Laine, once had a seemingly nice, older guy ask her on a date. She said yes because at the time she believed in saying yes to date with guys who seemed to have their lives together.

Every girl has this rule at sometime or another in their lives. "Whoever asks and they are normal I will say yes to!"

That goes out of the window as soon as you have a terrible date.

The date was all planned. It would be a double date with another couple who were his friends, all go to a concert and then out for drinks. Sounded fun enough to Laine who regularly enjoys those activities with her friends.

He then informed her that she would have to drive him to his friends house after the concert and she could either stay there or drive herself home. Laine isn't the type that you tell what to do. She also isn't the type to stay at someone's house on the first date.

Why couldn't he take her home? Well, homeboy had a DWI.

That date never happened.

A couple of months later we were all out and about one night and ran into DWI guy at the bar.

I'm guessing he found someone else to drive him around.

     Me and Lame-os

My worst date? Having this guy Amos (that's his real name, I believe he needs to learn how terrible this date was) came over to pick me up, told me I had to drive to the restaurant because he was afraid his breaks might not work and then he told me why he was too good to be in the town I lived in at the time.

The story is much more detailed, but Amos, if you are out there living in Fayettville, AR, I want you to know. Your date was TERRIBLE.

Buh-bye, LAME-OS.

My best date? Having a guy come pick me up a midnight (not THAT kind of date, mind out of gutter again) drive us out to the middle of no where and sit on the back of the truck while there was a meteor shower.

We broke up three days later but I will never forget how pretty the stars were that night.

'The Tales of Dating' is probably going to be a re-occurring series. Between the stories I hear from my friends and the ones I experience myself, there are just too many great stories that someone needs to share with the world.
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