The past few days have been all over the place. Here. There. Everywhere.
Trying to shop, clean, pack, get ready for my Nashville trip while also trying to feel better (silly cold/allergies) I've realized that something must be in the water.
Let me explain...
Last Friday night my cousin talked me into going to see a movie with her and her husband...and their friend she's been trying to set me up with for like a year. Ah. Maybe set-up is too harsh of a word. Let's go with meet. Now, on the flip side there is already a guy I have a crush on but we haven't 'technically' been out yet...So, I told her I would go eat and see a movie with her, her husband and this guy.
Plus, she said she'd pay for my movie ticket.
I met them to eat at Vino's, a cute, hipster pizza place in Little Rock. I'm not hipster but I'll play the part. I walk into the pizza place and find them in the back.. I say hi to my cousin and her husband and introduce myself to this guy. Hmm...what shall we call him? I'll call him Mr. Big Shot. Now he's talked a big talk to my cousin of how he's a ladies man, can get the ladies, blah blah blahhhhh. I'm not the type of girl to swoon and I'm guessing he thinks that I'm going to walk into the restaurant and just fall to pieces over him.
Ain't. Gonna. Happen. Homeboy.
We have some drinks and he doesn't talk to me. Just because I didn't walk-in and fall to pieces doesn't mean he should have acted like a 12-year-old at a Christmas dance. I tried to talk to him. I tried to be interested into the douchey things he had to say about his job, how he works out, his 'nutrition plan,' and some girl he liked at work (no joke) but there was no hope.
Now don't get me wrong - I don't consider this a date. I consider this a meet-n-greet. Love at first sight is for movies and Taylor Swift songs. However, Mr. Big Talk COULD have been polite. After we got done eating we headed for the theater to watch X-Men. Maybe I'm one of the X-Men and I"m invisible to others and Mr. Big Talk just couldn't see me? No? Oh well.
Movie time came. We sat beside each other because that just seemed like the right thing to do. Now don't get me wrong, I hate talkers in a movie. I get that. I can respect that. I didn't talk during the movie but to ask one question. I've seen some of the X-Men movies and I didn't know how one guy became his character...
So I asked Mr. Big Shot...
Me: "Who's that guy?"
Big Shot: "He's one of the characters."
Boom. The entire movie he said five words to me. When the movie was over I ran out of there so fast you'd think my boots were on fire and my hair was falling out. Peace out Big Shot. See you on the flip side.
Next...
I had to go to Clinique for some make-up. All I needed was powder. I'm a pretty straight-forward person. Small talk isn't my thing. Let's get in, get out, move on with our lives.
I walk up to the counter to get new make-up...and here is what happens.
Makeup Dude: HI! May I help you?
Me: Yes. I need this powder. (Hand him powder.)
Makeup Dude: Sure thing! This is a great powder! Do you like it? Any problems with it? Want to talk about it? (I couldn't make this up if I tried.)
Me: Yeah. I'm happy with it. That's all I need.
Makeup Dude: Well great! This has great coverage but I don't know if you are wearing it today or not.
Me: It's been a long day. It's hot outside. Stuff happens.
Makeup Dude: Are you out of it? Is that why you came in
(Side note: captain obvious, isn't he?)
Me: Yep. It's all i need.
Makeup Dude: Well okay, let me get that for you.
Me: Thanks.
Makeup Dude: Why you are here let me show you this new package we have that's worth yada yada yada and contains blah blah blah.
Me: No thanks. Those really aren't my colors. I just need powder today. Thanks for showing it to me though.
Makeup Dude: Well you know we spend millions of dollars on putting these colors together...they know what they are talking about...sure you don't have time to try on these colors?
Me: I don't wear pinks or greens on my eyes...I like neutrals. But thanks.
Makeup Dude: Well you should at least try it.
Me: Not today...
Makeup Dude: Are you sure?
Me: More positive by the minute.
Makeup Dude: I think we should at least try it on you.
Me: Not today.
Makeup Dude: Are you really sure?
Me: Silence.
The moral of this story is that I don't wear pink eye shadows. Yes, on some girls it looks gorgeous and they can pull it off and it's like a shimmer of goodness on their eyelids. Me? It looks like I walked into a bad version of Pretty Woman and instead of Richard GereI get the creepo in the Mustang.
I'm not sure if it's me lately - or if there is something in the water. Holy moly let it be something in the water and not me.
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